October 8, 2004
ANTIQUES AND COLLECTIBLES NEWSLETTER #251
I'm intrigued that tonight's presidential debate is supposed ot have a "town hall" format. Isn't that supposed to be
when anyone can step up to the mike and ask a question? I'l be really, really surprised if that happens. Up until
now, we've all been fed packaged sound bites as if we're idiots, so I don't have much hope of seeing any real
people asking real questions and getting real answers.
FROM THE DEPARTMENT OF PUT THEM ON THE SHELF WITH YOUR ELECTRIC TYPEWRITER AND 45 RPM RECORDS
Anyone remember the slide rule, that geekalicious accessory toted around by those with bandaids holding the bridges of their eyeglasses together? They were hurled into obsolescence in the 1970s by handheld calculators. Now more than 200 of these "antique" insturments are on display at Purdue University's Potter Engineering Center in West Lafayette, Indiana. Robert Miles, a Purdue professor emeritus of highway engineering, put the exhibit together with the help of Professor James Alleman, who has been collecting slide rules sinc the 1980s, and has acquired some from Purdue alumni, including astronaut Neil Armstrong. Armstrong's slide rule is included in the exhibit. So, if you were on the A-V squad in high school, and you still keep at least five ballpoint pens in your shirt pocket, hurry on over to Purdue.
THE BEST STORIES STILL COME FROM ENGLAND DEPARTMENT
Imagine that you are an enthusiast of vintage planes. You and a coupld of buddies fly a 1948 Auster J1-N plane to Hereford, and land it in a farmer's filed, something you've done hundreds of times before. Off you go to a local pub for lunch, and when you return you find that the farmer's cattle have eaten your plane. One of the htree aviators, Mike Jones, 66, a former police officer from Bristol, said, " This is the first time something like this has happened." I certainly hope so. If not, that wouldn't make Bristol et al very bright, now would it? Surveying the thousands of dollars worth of damage caused by the cattle having eaten a hole in the fuselage, he added, "When the farmer found out he put up barbed wire to protect the plane from further damage, but the cows broke it down to eat some more. It might have been the white color that attracted them. The wings are covered with chemicals, so maybe all these cows were on a high." Now there's an image familiar to all of us: stoned cows, and especially stoend cows eating a plane. The plane, or plat du jour as it were, was dismantled and taken home by truck. No word on whether the cows had a headache the next morning.
A TRUE STORY ABOUT THREE BOOBS
As if we haven't heard enough about the Osbournes, particularly their obnoxious son, Jack, we now have even more evidence that being the child of a rock star can make you positively stupid. It seems that Kimberly Stewart, aughter of Rod, had her old breast implants replaced with new ones. I guess the ones she had were so last year, that she simply had to get them replaced. Anyway, what to do with the old ones? She gave them to Jack Osbourne, possibly as a token of their lasting friendship (what has it been now, six months or so?). Jack, classy dude that he is, had them framed and hung on his wall. Now, I"m not trying to float any rumors about a romance between the two teen airheads. I mean, who would date that toad, Jack, anyway? Just thought you'd like to know what may become Jack's new collection.
American Accumulators, don't miss tonight's debate. I'm not saying it will be revealing, or even interesting. I just feel we all have an obligation to hear what the two candidates are saying, and then to vote. After that, spend the weekend out shopping for antiques and collectibles. That's what I'll be doing. I feel it's my obligation to help stimulate the economy. Have a great week, Accumulators. Happy hunting!
© 2004 Judith Katz-Schwartz. All rights reserved.
Antiques and Collectibles Newsletter #251
U.S. Library of Congress
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